hw;

LOL silly fat one :)

i have a shitload of hw i think, but i never write it down in my diary

so i would have no idea

okay

sor: i know i dont have hw (yessssssssssss!)

legal studies: possibly but i get too distracted to listen, WE DID HAVE HW:( which i have completed:)

adv. english: fk i think i did but i forgot what we had to do ( sumamrizing) which i am halfway through:D:D

economics: 1 part of an assignment is due but i think we did it in class as a group (fksake) and three sheets which i did, plus during the week imgonna make notes and memorise for topic test on friday

modern history: comparison thing which i have to do ( completeeedd )

ext. english: fkn reading and sumamrizing FK U WASTELAND. ill wasteland your mum. (don't even want to bring it up.)

geography: copy out sara's book more and think of project thing (IMPOSSIBLE.) (FUCKING HELL)

________________________________________________

moving on. ive been adding your mum to everyhing, i'm so sorry if i offend anyone. its just habbit now from allysio, who caught it from adrian. SO SORRY.

for example;

in legal studies:

*'x' comes in and stands next to me, is eating something*

'y': what are you eating 'x'?

me: his eating his mum. chyea.

I FELT SO BAD AFTER. but i couldn't help it. i add your mum to everyhing. YEA YOUR MUM AUTOSAVED.

sorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrryyyy<3

boys are stupid. very stupid. ahah

look at this excerpt:

`` ____ xx ; v.styLsz . ! demOnisiingtheeuniiverrsee:

ayyy sxxcccc

[b];DEVENISHHHH[/b] ] GO SIRENSS (:

lol? watev. i broke my wireless ):

`` ____ xx ; v.styLsz . ! demOnisiingtheeuniiverrsee:

cozz u brokee it with that massive ass of yourss :P;)

[b];DEVENISHHHH[/b] ] GO SIRENSS (:

um no. coz it saw your face and decided to self destruct(:

`` ____ xx ; v.styLsz . ! demOnisiingtheeuniiverrsee:

LMAO sdoinn babe?

[b];DEVENISHHHH[/b] ] GO SIRENSS (:

playing with a fan

`` ____ xx ; v.styLsz . ! demOnisiingtheeuniiverrsee:

DAAAMMMNNN what kind?

[b];DEVENISHHHH[/b] ] GO SIRENSS (:

WTFK. an oriental one...

`` ____ xx ; v.styLsz . ! demOnisiingtheeuniiverrsee:

oofftt maa badd . i was like DAMMNN THISS GRLL :P;)

[b];DEVENISHHHH[/b] ] GO SIRENSS (:

yuck. just watev.

`` ____ xx ; v.styLsz . ! demOnisiingtheeuniiverrsee:

you could at least pretend to enjoy it.

i just gave up after that.

------------------------------

on another note my baby cousins are over.

they are so gorgeous, i don't understand why people want to abort/abandon.

i don't think it's wrong, but i think that people don't understand on what they are going to miss out on.

their so beautiful

like my baby cousin ameesha who is 3, she sat in my lap and at first she put her tiny hands on my lips and says: "shhh!"

and i continued to talk and tease her

and she got upset and almost cried

she tried rejecting me when i kissed her but then she just gave me a total look of desperation and gave in by sinking into me and hugging me.

(:

ohFUCK

The price of retribution.
Muscle spasms in my back are the price of a good day.
It's okay, continue, just let me have another good day tomorrow.:)
HAY SARA!!
:D


















oooooooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

:D

I could not be more happier with today...:D

I knewwwwww it. I knew that when someshit happened last night and the night before, and this morning, something would make up for it.
AND IT DID!:D:D
They changed me from society and culture to geography!:D:D:D:D
They had to change my mod.hist classes around as well as my English. And at first I was sad because

a) i thought I'd have a different teacher in modern history and I LOVE MY TEACHER hehe

b) i love my English class too! so i was sad when i would have to change

BUT

I, Devenish, being almighty as I am INCIDENTALLY got the same teacher for mod.hist that I had before? Isn't that GREAT???!

*gloats*

And also because I am just so cool, MY ENGLISH CLASS IS MAD! Quiet yes, filled with chauvinistic pinheads, yes, BUT SO MANY PEOPLE I LIKE ARE IN IT!!! So happy, so so happy!!

Speaking of english .Grr. Mark. Grr. He stole my seat. I got there first and I wanted to sit next to Michael but his like "HIS MY ASIAN"

)':

So I got him back. That is the end of my retribution story, now I shall behave appropriately towards him and not persecute him anymore!:) We is friends. In my opinion anyway:D:D:D

LOL I'm such a drama queen. WHY IS ENGLISH SO SEGREGATED BTW? Girl's don't have cooties anymore=(

Haha english teacher is mad...he challenges me whereas my old english teacher (AS MUCH AS I LOVE HER) didn't. SO happy, however Jimmy thinks that he is boring and sleeps in class. I have seen. Jimmy does sleep in class. It's funny:D

OMG VIVIANS PERM! SHE LOOKS
SO
G.

So so sso sos soooooooooooo soso so so so soooooooo pretty!!!!She looks like those cute girls in jap magazines that you can only ever sigh and be envious about, because you know you can't even be like that because your indian. HAHA!

Random blogging is fun. UMUM RELIGION. Our teacher rants o.O He needs a blog so he can get it all of his chest and teach us:) But he tells us stories with morals, and maybe that's his teaching style. If it is, its interesting. Also, you can't really learn much from this topic, its basically formulating your own opinion.

My modern history class is quiet *sigh. No one participates ): But its better then it being all rowdy and disgusting:)

We had Ash Wednesday Liturgy today.

I SAW MY RELIGION TEACHERS UNDERARM.

EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.WWWWW.THE HAIR.THE HAIR.

UM SAW DALE TODAY!!! WAS SO HAPPY!!!!!

Today was such a good day. Reckon I'll have a shit one tomorrow at the price of this one?

LOL WANNA SEE THE SPELL CHECK THAT COMES UP FOR DEVENISH?

• Dervish
• Develish
• DANISH LOLOL
• Dovish...0.o
• Devonian

OMG!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIVAN!!!!!

SEXY 16 ;)

:)

You know what's an all time favourite song of mine?
We ride - Rihanna

I have shite hair. I'm angry at myself for cutting it. Grrrrrrrrrr I'm waiting for my fringe to grow. I like slow rnb songs and beat ridden ones.

Why am I complaining about my hair? I'm so shallow. I can't believe there are kids who are dying from starvation. Cancer yeaa we can't do much, massacres yeaa same deal, but starvation? Come on, we're disgusting people.

Fuck Rihanna. Fuck Hair. Fuck RnB.

A prayer to all those children and adults.

You know what else can go fuck itself?
I'll make a list;

FUCK:

1. boys
2. fighting with rents, its pointless
3. looking hot all the time
4. trying to have a good body
5. COMPLAINING
6. being influenced by other families
7. not having a good time
8. SUPERFICIAL PEOPLE
9. uneducated shites who honk at me from their fkn car
10. guys/girls who expect others to say hi to them first
11. 'sik kunts'
12. people who put down others because their not sophisticated enough
13. people who can't accept others
14. people who have a problem with other people's interests
15. i like heavy metal, classical, and rnb. STEREOTYPE ME. JUST TRY.
16. competitiveness
17. putting on a show for others
18. assessment tasks
19. boredom
20. laziness

i COULD go on. But I'm too lazzyy

FUCK LAZINESS. HAHA

Sorry if the swearing offended people.

Revelation.

When I want something, I will have no self control.
See example with water?
As soon as the water hit my tongue, I couldn't stop drinking it. And now I'm going to go get another glass. And maybe another.
Until I am sick of it's taste.
And then I will hate it for a while.


And go back to craving it.

Ice.

I have a glass of icey cold water in front of me. It's so cold it's fogged upthe glass. The water is so still nothings moving inside it.
i can't wait to drink it, i know i will feel instantly refreshed, even though i have a cough.
Fuck that.
XD
It's getting even more foggier. This glass of ice cold refreshing water is making me quuiete thirsty. The glass is ice cold and I can almost feel the taste of refreshing ice cold water on my tongue.
But I'm going to deny myself.
I'm going to drink it now, ready?
I have picked up the glass.
The cold numbs my fingers upon first touch.
I can't wait to drink it i really can't.
I'm lifting it to my lips, my outh is slightly salivating and my jaw has locked from wanting this
icy
cold
foggy
water.




















I have had a few sips. I feel refreshed. I want more.



I have no idea what this post is about. But I love cold water on a cold day.
Have some:)

sniff.

I cry less then I used to when I was younger.

Now it's less then 5 tear drops. (:


My mum thinks I depend on her too much. She seeks out to punish me with words. I can't explain it. Shall I juxtapose? Don't care if it doesn't make sense.



At school I am

1. smiley


2. a leader


3. a talker


4. louddddddddd!


5. always having fun


6. very affectionate


7. basically, me:)

At home. Oh.

1. Quiet


2. distanced


3. craving for privacy


4. craving for Independence


5. feel inferior


6. can't wait for school to start.


7. wish i lived at school.

My parents will never know me until I move out of this house. Please don't get me wrong, they are great, I have a fantastic house, a fantastic life. But when things get handed to you just like that, where's the adventure? Where's the independence?

Where is the self-discovery?

I feel as if I can't show who I can be at home. Why is that, can someone tell me? Why can I never talk to anyone about it, can someone tell me? Why am I so obscure, can someone please tell me?

You know what's funny? This guilt. I won't go against my parents wishes, or do what I really want I to do because I really love them. That's why I can't discuss all this with people, I feel sucha guilt. I feel a guilt now. Sometimes I wish I'd die in this tragic and horrific way, and they'd find all the letters, poems, stories and even my blog, so they'd know how much I love them. Crazy yea? I know. I know. That's how much I think they are unaware of it.

I've sacrificed friends, I've sacrificed so much of my happyness, .a chance of finding love, creating memories because of them. And they actually think I don't care. My mum honestly thinks we're not alike. That I almost hate her. It kills me.

I'm selfish. Today is the yr 7 family mass. My sister is in yr 7 so she went and I asked my parents if they were going. And they said no, and I replied; "BUT YOU HAVE TO...YOU SHOULD BE THERE," To which they simply said; "It's okay, she's different. She's not like you. She doesn't need me."

I was astounded. What am I, needy and clingy? Am I really? Am i not independent? Have I not tried again and again to show that I am? What...just. What??! So I got angry. I told her I didn't care if parents came to my events. That that's the reason I'm not going travelling with them in the holidays. I knew at the time I should control myself, but I didn't. She called me back and she said "WHAT!" And I said "You made me sound so stupid. You hurt me." And she goes, "Ashna doesn't need me. She's different. She's not like you."

Not like you.

What am I?

So she went to drop Ashna, came back and came to my computer and said. "You are like my sister, your never happy. You have the devil inside your brain." I'm pretty sure the devil bit was metaphorical. She's not very religious. And she goes "Something broke inside me when you said you didn't care if we weren't there. There's alot of difference between you and Ashna. What does that say about you as a daughter?"

I felt so guilty. So selfish. So bad. Why do I cause people pain, why do I make my parents so upset? Why do I break their hearts so easily?

They would have been better with someone other then me. Really I'm the worst one you can have. Maybe I don't hate me maybe I do. But I definitely hate the pain I cause. I hope none of you did anything bad enough in your other life to have a kid like me in the future.

(: i'm a liar. i cry even more then i did in primary. (:

Hmmm.

Not much happaned today.
It was just...bleak. Dale's last day. Laugh a sombre laugh with me.




If my closest friends left, it wouldn't impact me as much as Dale's leaving does. Tis true. Doing ext. homework, I wonder what she expects, I wonder if I'll make her cut. Yay highschool.

Feeling very dreary.

Listening to Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata.
Yer I like classical music. It's so beautiful.
The day I meet a brilliant music composer, the day I fall in love.
I kid you not.

What.

"Blogger Sign In
We found the following errors:
Your browser's cookie functionality is disabled. Please enable JavaScript and cookies in order to use Blogger.
Blogger Help explains how."

.
.
.
confused silence.
mum: why are you so quiet now? o.o

I won't even begin to try and comprehend that. Woah THIS AUTOSAVES! How cool!:D
(you don't have to tell me I have a short attention span.)

I was feeling quiet intellectual and I was hoping to utilize that on this..thing..:S But of course, that was before bogus about 'cookies' and 'blogger' popped.

There's a famous Greek philosophiser named Epicurus. He believed that if you really wanted to be happy, you had to have three things;

1. Friends.
2. Freedom
3. Thought

I learnt that in society and culture on Friday, so it's not a totally useless subject.

Friends. Friends, friends FRIENDS. Who are your friends? Do you trust your friends? What is a friend? Do you believe your better off alone, as I sometimes do? Do you, in your deepest hearts of hearts, believe your friends are real?

Sometimes I think, because of high school, people with similar interests band together. Safety in numbers, you could call it. So when we get thrown together and delve deeper within ourselves, are they friends? Sometimes I think I have no friends (laugh if you may), but I think I only have 'friends' because of how circumstances are. If I hadn't come to this school in 08', I seriously doubt I'd have the 'friends' I do now. See, circumstances. Don't get me wrong, my friends are great, they are really are (: But I'm questioning the basic fundamentals of friendship, if it really exists.

HAHA FOOD FOR THOUGHT~ Epicurus also said we need to escape materialism, and we should do this with friends.

To some extent, we use our friends. Don't deny it, no one wants to be the 'loser' or the loner in the school. Everyone wants to have friends. Like everyone wants tomorrow's new technology. Friends make us feel good, but maybe only in the sense that nobody can attack us for being a loner by having a group. Questions questions questions.

It's like a pack of wolves. Wolves travel in packs. (shocking tautology I'M SORRY.) Why?

Because they don't want to feel threatened and to protect themselves and each other. That's why. Note: Maybe that's why the bitchiest groups in school are often the most biggest? So to escape materialism in the world, if we take friends with us, we're clutching at straws. Epicurus, why did your friends make you feel good? Why did you suggest that we should never eat alone? I'm sorry, but social deprivation doesn't concern me.

Sorry Epicurus, but I believe happiness comes within ourselves. Yes there is death in the world, yes there is cruelty, sickness and unfairness in the world. I know that. Bla bla, but if I say to myself

I am happy and I am content

Then I am. No matter if I'm jailed, or in the country side running free. I am happy and I am content. I say it, I belive it, I feel it. Precisely in that order.

Freedom. Some people believe you need to escape your physical surroundings to be free. I'm sorry but you are so fucking materialistic if you think that. No you don't, okay? You sit in a quiet corner and you meditate. Do as the Buddhists do, they got it right. Doesn't matter where you are, if you focus and forget about the insignificant, then you have achieved freedom. It doesn't matter your parents are crazily strict (like mine), I am free. No one if restricting my thoughts. No one has placed a mental clamp over my brain. I am breathing. I am living. I am thinking. (:

SOO thought, huh? This is thought. Keeping it in my brain is thought. I'm so content just letting it out. This whole blog is about thought. (:

So if you read this, keep what I've offered as an opinion, in mind. Maybe in due course they'll change...maybe I'm very immature at the moment. But this is how I view the world and sense now.

BYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE:D:D

officially broken my blog virginity.

This is exactly like livejournal!

Let's lets just a run down of whats going through my mind currently, yes?

1. I'm pretending to study
2. I'm super nervous about mufti day tomorrow
3. The term 'mufti' is so disgusting.
4. I don't like indian boys with blonde streaks
5. There are stomach in my butterflies
6. LOL^ that's how nervous I am about tomorrow.

So number 1...Why am I pretending to study? Because my parents want me to study everyday. I want me to study everyday. But I can't...I'm too distracted. By msn, by life.

Numero 2: I HATE HATE HATE HATE WITH A PASSION, mufti days. *SHIVER*
I really do. I think of the jungle our school is, and I think about how one insignificant detail can throw a the opposite of a spanner in the works. Something like an extra gear to make it work faster. It's like "OMG LOOK AT HER ZOMG !!11!!!1! HER HAIR OMG WTFUCKKK !!1!HAHAHA LAUGH POINT VICTIMIZE HIDE INSECURITES ABOUTSELF".

I hate them. Everytime, it's a fucking parade. Sorry to break the harsh reality to you, but we're not celebrties. No one outside of school cares. Our school is a jungle, not just literally. What was Mr.Wooby thinking??!! We are a bunch of demure and insecure teenagers. We are going to pounce on others like lions on a dead antelope.

I am so gone tomorrow. You may see my atelopian remains being ravaged by a particually hateful lion. Male or female. Hopefully not male.

I HATE YOU MALE SPECIES. HATE YOU.

3. Yuck. How bogan do we have to be to make up the term 'mufti'. Just yuck.

4. Get him away from me. LMAO He thinks his cool and 'GNSTARR BRAAAHH!' Hahahah oh please. Close your legs and open a book!:)

5. Judgement Day. Mufti Day. What do they have in common? No more on the subject.

6. He he. WHY MR. WOOBY WHY.

*sob